2026: The Year of Chill

With only tumbleweeds and armadillos in sight, I decided it was time to be brave

I quietly deemed 2026 my year of "chill". I wish I had chosen a better word for it, but it is the word I shared with those closest to me, half in jest and half in seriousness at the time. To be transparent, I didn’t fully believe it myself. Why, you ask?

When I turned thirty at the end of 2025, I stood at a crossroads. You know the one that looks like train tracks in the desert surrounded by armadillos and tumbleweeds. The crossroads existed solely in my mind, but it was one that I knew I had to acknowledge. As early as elementary school, I remember worrying. It started with worrying about germs, getting cancer, and cigarette smoke poisoning my lungs. Then the worries turned into feeling responsible for things that were not my fault and having to grow up way sooner than I deserved. Nonetheless, the worries persisted, grew, and morphed into extreme anxiety, perfectionism, obsessive-compulsive disorder, and misery. I was scared of everything, and I do mean everything you could ever think or imagine. Fast-forward to young adulthood, where I had babies and then spent my entire twenties worried sick over all the “what ifs” that could happen to my children.

Fast forward to the present day, where I have continued to live in fear. It took two decades of worrying and wrestling with the Lord to finally let go of my fear of, well, fear. Now, I won’t say I never feel worried or anxious, or that I am never scared, but I will say that my armor against those things is much stronger thanks to God.

I have been a Christian since I was a young teenager, yet I wasn’t living in the full freedom of Christ. I was chained to my fear, which was causing anxiety, OCD, and a half-hearted life on the sidelines because I was too scared to do anything about it. I will never forget a close family member saying to me, in genuine love and concern, after they witnessed me obsessing over something trivial in the grand scheme of things, “Wow, it must be miserable to live like that.” It stung, but the truth hurts, especially when we need to hear it most.

My testimony includes a lot of loss, heartache, and tough times, as most of us relate to, so I can testify to God’s goodness. I have seen Him work miracles, protect me from things I didn’t even know I needed protection from, and have felt His loving hand guide me. I have lived in His goodness time and time again. Yet I still struggled with worry, which is just doubt in disguise. Can you tell I am a Peter trying to be a Paul?

It took going through the hardest season of my life for me to begin to live in true freedom from the crippling fear I have lived with since childhood. So I went scorched earth on it all, with the help and power of the Holy Spirit, and I can’t even explain how different my life is six months later. I am going to share some random things that I did, but please hear the heart of this loud and clear: Jesus broke those chains for me. Sure, I have put in a lot of work by searching His word, praying, doing hard things, getting to the root of my trauma, and all those necessary steps, but Jesus did the work in my heart and brought full healing.

If you’re miserable with your struggle against anxiety, fear, and worry, here are a few thoughts and things I have done throughout this journey of choosing differently. It isn’t a magic cure or overnight fix, but I do believe it will help you.

-I became a student of God’s word daily, and not just a halfhearted reader of His word. I know that sounds harsh, but it is the truth. I started studying God’s word to get to the root of who He is. There were many false beliefs I held about God and how He works in the lives of His children. His word will continuously change your life the more you read it.

-Prayer changes things. I began to pray for wisdom, to thank God for all He was doing, and to ask for direction out of the miry pit. If I felt anxious, which I constantly did at that time, I worked hard at rewriting my brain to go to God in prayer first before anything else. Prayer is powerful.

-I became determined to write a different story for myself and my family. The only way forward for me became doing the inner work to let go of all that I had carried that was preventing me from living a full life. It was hard work to sit face-to-face with all that I carried, but I want nothing more than to be the holiest and healthiest version of myself for my family.

-I took care of my health physically, emotionally, and mentally. If we are no longer able to function, how will we care for our family? This question helped me to take charge of my health on all fronts. A short, non-exhaustive list of things I did that helped me: therapy, spending time with friends, working out, walking in the sunshine, resting, taking vitamins, and other things. At one point, I did try a medication for my depression during a particularly hard season; there is no shame in this, of course, but I personally didn’t feel like it helped me, so I stopped taking it. Your health choices are up to you; these are just things that helped me.

-I grieved all things past and present without stuffing my emotions deep down inside of my soul. There was a stretch where I was allowing myself to feel the pain from circumstances that happened a decade or more ago because I had never taken the time to admit that it hurt me. There is nothing wrong with grieving and then pressing on. I know, because I lived it, that God cares about our heartbreak in this life. He also wants us to continue pressing onward and living for Him, which He helps us to do in His strength.

-I kept going forward every day, no matter how I felt. My motto was, “one day at a time.” I took life day by day, as Scripture tells us to focus on today and not worry about tomorrow, so I really began to live out that verse. Even on the hardest days, when I didn’t want to get out of bed, I still thanked God for the day and got up to live my life.

There are other thoughts I will share when I can articulate them clearly, but I pray that this article pointed you to our only hope: Jesus Christ. This life is full of hard seasons and circumstances, but we can press onward, even if we keep walking the road with tears in our eyes. Eventually, a brighter and glorious season is coming when we will feel joy again, but you can’t give up before you get there, friend!

If you felt inspired by this article, I would love for you to follow along with me. I am a Christian writer who is daily striving to be more like Christ. Welcome to my corner of the internet!